Struggles as a parent.

There are some things that as a mommy, I find heart breaking. The number one thing on that list is tears on my child's face. There's something about a tear running down those precious faces that just brings me to my knees! I know that through life they're going to have struggles, and challenges to face. I also know that tears will happen right along with the joys. But man. . .the tears hurt.

Today we found out that Gabe will be changing rooms in school. The enrollment numbers for 2nd and 3rd grade are so high that they've hired a new teacher for each grade. Todd and I have been praying that it would be Dallas (in 3rd grade) to get moved, rather than Gabe (in 2nd grade). Dallas is so easy going, and takes change and adapts to well. Big changes like this are harder for Gabe. But we knew that the likely hood of Gabe getting moved was higher. He and his cousin Kyle are in the same class, and have been having issues with it. So we knew. . . We knew it would be one or the other, and knowing that student wise Gabe is the harder student, we had a feeling it would be him moved.

There are some benefits that are going to come with this move. . . He will be down sizing from a class of 28, to a class of 20. That will of course leave more time for the teacher to focus attention on the students that may need it, and give more one on one time for each child. This also does split Gabe and Kyle. I know the boys love being in the same room, but I think the individuality of different rooms will be a good thing for both boys to have. They have kind of used each other as a crutch to fall back on. Neither have really branched out and met more kids in the class, because they have each other, and they know each other.

I'm just feeling for my Gabey. He bawled when I gave him the news. He went through the list of usual 2nd grade worries. But the top on his list were the "what if I don't know anyone" questions. He's very shy, and doesn't put himself out there like Dallas does. It takes more effort and work for Gabe to make friends. He's slow to trust, but has such a strong friendship when you are at that level. I know he'll be fine in the long run. . .but still. The tears. They crush me every time. I'm their mommy. I'm supposed to be able to fix the hurt, and fix the worry. I'm the mommy. I'm supposed to be able to protect and be the strong one. But I find that as they grow older, and the problems become more complex, its harder to know where to step in, and where to let them experience life with gentle guidance, prayer, and reassurance.

At this point all we can do is sit back and pray that everything transitions smoothly. That Gabriel feels comfortable, and secure in his new room, and that we don't see any set backs academically from him. We know he's already struggling a little. . . so we're really hoping the smaller class size will help him some. And at this point we'll just pray that his sweet, loving nature shines through and that he is surrounded by friends that will truly enrich his life.


On that note. . . I figure I'll share Dallas and Gabe's school pictures this year!!!

Dallas: 8 years old, 3rd grade

Gabriel: 7 years old, 2nd grade